Forcing myself to change

It's 11:35 on Tuesday night and I'm sitting on my couch trying to find ways to stay awake. Switching from a day schedule to a night schedule is hard. My night shifts at the hospital start tomorrow and I'm not looking forward to the inevitable crash at 6 AM....1 hour premature.

1. I went to the gym. I'm back to lifting, at least I hope I am. I'm going back to my old favorite, the New Rules of Lifting for Women. I figure, I'll start there, get back into it, and then branch out to what I really want to do...one of those plans that is chest this day, arms that day, etc. I need a foundation before I do that. I know me, I'll quit.

2. I read a magazine about exercising. Yay for Women's Running and Muscle & Fitness Hers magazines. Lots of inspiration!

I do have to say...I was in the best shape of my life when I was working nights...well, ok not really the best...that was when I was crazy person getting up at 3:45 AM to make it to the gym at 4 because I refused to be late (on time) to work at 8. That was the best. But, other than crazy person, night shift was where it was at for exercising.

After 2, I'm out of ideas of what to do. No, 3. I wrote my blog entry. Ok, now I'm out of ideas. I was hoping to stay up until at least 2 or 3. Not so much.

Maybe it's time for some TV and hoping it doesn't wake up the Coastie.

Old Friends and New Ideas

I'm sitting here after getting off the phone with a friend from Texas. I blinked and I have been in FL for a month. Yikes...where did the time go? It's so great to talk to friends that know you after being surrounded by people that don't. I don't have to pretend to be something I'm not, I can just be. I'm working on just "being" here in FL with my new job and new friends. It's hard. However, I feel like the people I have surrounded myself with will very much allow me to be myself.

I can't help but wonder, though, if new ideas come from new situations. For example, I am having a very hard time keeping up with the running. I ran yesterday morning, but it left much to be desired. I am going to try running this evening (hopefully). I'm trying to mix it up a bit to learn where I will end up here.

I have a vision of myself and this tall, skinny, runner-chick that dresses in running related clothes all day everyday (minus the scrubs at work) and still look amazing. At 5'3", I'm sure the tall thing is not happening. However, the dream of being skinny may never go away. I do, unfortunately, have this eating problem. Since I got home last night, I have tried to eat my weight in snack food and continue to sit an complain about not being in the shape I want to be. Do you see the problem here?

So, I need to make a change. A change to go along with all the other changes, new state, new house, new job, new friends...same me. Change 1: run. None of this saying I'm a runner and not really putting in the miles. I'm going to actually do the work and then be proud of myself when I reap the rewards of my hard work. Change 2: eat healthier...notice that it does not say to eat healthy, but rather healthier. That is because there are certain things I may not be able to give up. No, that's not right, there are certain things I am not willing to give up!

I've already started on Change 3: Be the best nurse I can be!

Crazy TV Shows

I just got finished watching a 2 hour Criminal Minds and I am left with 1 question: Who thinks this stuff up? I'm more worried about encountering the people that are paid to sit in a room and think up crazy stories to put on this show than I am of running into one of their characters. You have to be seriously crazy to have all that running around in your mind! From serial killers who eat their kills to people that hurt children...I'm not sure I could deal with being the person in charge of creating all that craziness!

On a more important note, the Coastie and I are safely in our new "home" in Florida. From the east coast to the south to the east coast again. It's going to be me seeing the country on the government's dime because we have moved so many times! We are currently searching for a gym to help me lose these 10 lbs I've gained while not running and dealing with the stress of a move!

I also start my work back in the ED tomorrow! Orientation was not great, but tomorrow I am back on the unit. Gotta love patient care!